2008 July 01 « Llama Fajita’s Den O’ Iniquity

The Greatest Product Name EVER.

Ummmm…

The greatest product ever?

How can you not possibly want to go out and buy some of this shit…if for no other reason than to simply have a bottle of this mess on display in your home?

Dammit.

I’m in love. I wish my ass itched a lot.

July 1, 2008 Posted by llamafajita | Uncategorized | monkey butt | 2 Comments

Getting To Know Llama Fajita

Llama is a stripper/lady of the night who enjoys long walks in the park, sunsets, bowling and the taste of fresh AID on her lips. Llama is also an avid collector of all things ‘Bon Jovi’ and once caught a foul ball off the bat of Pete Incaviglia at old Arlington Stadium back in 1988.

The following is an interview w/ Llama Fajita…

WordPress: So, Llama tell us how you got into stripping?

Llama: Well, I really sort of fell into it. I was working at a 7-11, making minimum wage and I had packed on a few extra pounds from spending so much time around the Slurpy machine. A friend of mine invited me out to a club one night to watch her work and after seeing the kind of money she was making, in addition to the workout she got from riding the pole, I decided to give it a shot.

WordPress: And the whoring? When did that all begin?

Llama: Well, the whoring pretty much happened after I’d been stripping for a few months and had decided to strap on a real serious cocaine habit. Seemed like the right thing to do and, since I’m originally Costa Rican, I’m naturally slutty so really, sucking cock for drugs never seemed like THAT big of a deal.

WordPress: You’re truly an inspiration. So, how long have you been here in Texas?

Llama: This time around? About 4 years. I actually started out here in Dallas, then moved around for quite a few years before coming back ‘home’ again. I love it here. I make in an hour what cousins of mine make in an entire month. Plus, the mens here are so much hotter. Costa Rican guys only average 90 seconds before they shoot their load so I love these big, strong redneck types. Go Cowboys!

WordPress: Indeed. And what made you decide on Texas as your base of operation?

Llama: Well, initially it was nothing more than the other side of the river, ya know? But after getting to know the people here, I don’t think I ever had the thought of leaving. Everyone is so nice, unless you’re a transplant from up North. Then, you’re probably a cocksucker. Go home, Yankee!

WordPress: Very good. So, they tell me you’re a big baseball fan. Who’s you favorite team?

Llama: Oh, the Texas Rangers, for sure. They’ve been pretty bad for forever but I think things are starting to turn around. And that Mike Young is a fuckin’ dreamboat!

WordPress: And what’s your take on the whole ’steroid issue’ in baseball?

Llama: I think any drug which has the potential to shrink a man’s junk to the size of an acorn is a terrible, terrible thing. What’s the point of having big, massive arms if you can’t even grab hold of your shit when you’re all alone and rub one out, right? Seems silly to me.

WordPress: Interesting take. So, does Llama Fajita have any charities or causes she’d like to mention before we wrap this interview up?

Llama: Definitely. I’m not only a stripper and a whore but I’m also an activist who thinks our country is going down the tubes with that nasty bastard, George Bush. Vote for Obama! Sure, thus far he’s really nothing more than empty promises and pretty speeches but he’s not 100 years old like McCain and at least he doesn’t have giant cankles like Hillary! Gross!

WordPress: I think that’s the perfect way to end this thing. Thank you very much for your time.

Llama: Thank you. Hopefully, this interview has given people some insight on exactlly what kind of person I am.

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Llama Fajita’s Den O’ Iniquity

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The Greatest Product Name EVER.

Getting To Know Llama Fajita

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